Yesterday I passed out. I’ve only passed out two and half times in my life. It’s a very weird feeling. Like falling into a dream, after which it seems like lots of time has passed, when it hasn’t.

The first time I only half passed out. Beezly will remember this well. We were riding down the hill from his house to my house, two people on a pedal bike, when we hit a pot-hole in the road. We swerved and both flew over the handlebars, at high speed. I landed on top of Beezly and kind of surfed on his face, leaving him a lot worse off than me injury-wise.

But for some reason the shock of the incident caused me to start seeing stars. I slumped over a nearby wall and felt myself start to lose conciousness. I dont think I actually passed out, but eventually the stars filled my vision completely, and I lost control of my limbs. My legs couldn’t take my own weight, as Beezly and the other guy carried me somewhere to sit down. Given that Beezly’s face was pooring with blood, I was being a bit of a wuss. …This must’ve been about ten years ago now.

The second time I had been lying on the sofa for hours watching a long episode of touch of frost. It came to a commercial break, and I stood up and ran upstairs to use the toilet. I quickly felt very dizzy, and sat down on the toilet. I put my head between my knees, but it was too late. I woke up sprawled all over the bathroom floor, with my trousers round my ankles and my ear pressed against the base of the sink. This left me with a painful bruise on the side of my head, I must’ve hit the sink quite hard. Luckily not too hard. I wouldn’t have wanted to be found dead in that position. …This was a couple of year ago.

The third time was yesterday! I went snowboarding with my housemates. I’d been out drinking the night before, and what with the early start, I was feeling a little ill. We went up in the gondala and did one run down. I was having fun, but starting to feel a little rough. Then in a crowded gondala on the way to the top of the mountain again, I started feeling very ill. I told my mates I was going to be sick, which prompted the usual joking discussions about seafood etc, but then strangely, rather than spewing all over their feet, I passed out. I woke up on the floor of the gondala, lying on my back, with a whole crowd of swiss skiers looking down at me. One of them was holding my legs above me, which I think helped the blood come back to my head. The hangover was a factor, but I had only become ill later on in the morning, and very suddenly. I decided that it was probably more to do with the undercooked egg I ate for breakfast yesterday morning.